Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie
This is, arguably, my favorite cinematic comedy of the modern era. That seems odd, and rather insulting to other cinematic laugh-fests, but the truth is, “Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie” has more laughs in its 74-minute running time than most films can muster in 90 minutes or more. And its brisk running time means that things move fast and furious, even when the film Mike and the ‘Bots are watching– the 1955 sci-fi cheese-fest “This Island Earth” –grinds to a ridiculous halt.
Even though I doubt anyone not familiar with “MST3K,” and the riffing industry Joel Hodgson (the series’s original creator) and Michael J. Nelson (the film’s lead character) continue to give us, will be reading this review, but I suppose a summary of the film’s, and show’s, premise is required. In an underground lair known as Deep 13, Dr. Clayton Forrester (Trace Beaulieu) has spent the past seven years performing experiments by shooting a man into space, and forcing him to watch some of the worst films of all-time. To what purpose? As near as I can tell, just for the Hell of it. What he doesn’t count on, however, is the human building robots to keep him company, and help him survive the experiments by throwing riffs on all manner of subjects (from pop culture and politics to history and literature) at the screen. In the movie, it’s Mike Nelson (played by, um, Mike Nelson), along with the golden smart-ass Crow T. Robot (Beaulieu) and suave, gumball-looking underpants collector Tom Servo (Kevin Murphy), again “This Island Earth,” a sci-fi alien movie that was relatively well-respected in the ’50s, but like so many genre films from the era, hasn’t really aged well.
In all honesty, I could probably spend the rest of this review quoting some of my favorite lines from this movie, scripted to subversive perfection by Nelson, Beaulieu, Murphy, Mary Jo Pehl, Paul Chaplin, Bridget Jones (now Bridget Jones Nelson), and director Jim Mallon (who also performs the purple robot, Gypsy). The “host” segments are kind of hit-and-miss, as they always were on the show (although the sequence with Mike dealing with the aftermath of running into the Hubble telescope is priceless), but it’s the jokes thrown at the movie that make us laugh the hardest, especially when it comes to dealing with the alien’s absurd-looking foreheads. And make sure not to leave when the end credits start, because more hilarity is prepared for us, especially when it comes to Rando. Who? Just watch; no other film has made sticking through the credits more worthwhile.
The film came and went in theatres in 1996, but I was fortunate enough to see it twice during its too-brief run. I still have one of the film’s mini-posters mounted, and have gotten it signed by many of the show’s alums over the years (I’m only missing Nelson and Murphy among the main players). And I got the early DVD of the film before it went out-of-print until 2008. It marked the end of an era for the show– it was the last time we saw Beaulieu don Dr. Forrester’s green lab coat, and voice the sardonic Crow, as the film came when Comedy Central was airing the last episodes of the series’s seventh season. (This lead to one of the funniest lines in the movie, when, after the main scientist of “Earth” has finished building an alien device– “Please say we the Sci-Fi Channel. Oh please, oh please!”. It was Sci-Fi that resurrected the show for three more seasons, with Bill Corbett, a writer on the show, taking over the role of Crow.) From all accounts, it was Hell to make the movie, but from suffering, great art comes. Okay, so maybe “MST3K: The Movie” doesn’t quite reach the inspired, emotional, comedic heights of classics like “Some Like It Hot,” “City Lights,” “Young Frankenstein,” and “Sherlock Jr.,” but any film that gives us so many unforgettable quips– from “Yes, let’s slip away under cover of afternoon in the biggest car in the county.” and “Ahh, there are two woodies in this scene.” to “I just know they’re gonna probe my anus.” and “I’m gonna curl up in his sock drawer…and sleep for days.” –deserves mention with the very best the medium has given us over the years.
