Reality Bites
Does it make me a bad Gen Xer that it took me 30 years to watch Ben Stiller’s “Reality Bites?” The truth is, a lot of the main pieces of this 1994 cult classic- mainly in the cast- just never resonated with me growing up in a way that I was interested in. Now, at middle age, I’ve found myself contemplating where I fit in with my generation- in large part because Threads, my preferred social media platform of late, has put me in touch with many fellow Xers- and Stiller really did capture something about the generation moving into the workforce, and life itself, in the ’90s and beyond. I watched this film, and it connected.
Never shy of making comedic statements on society in his films, Stiller shoots a lot of this film- especially the documentary footage Lelaina Pierce is filming of her friends- in a way akin to “The Real World,” the MTV reality show that kicked off the trend that would take hold in exploitative, and false, ways in the ’00s. That he then has his character’s TV channel executives chop Lelaina’s footage up into a parody of how Gen X was marketed to by a generation that didn’t understand their anxieties and pressures completes the satire. His film is firmly on the side of its characters, whether they deserve it or not, and wants to let the viewers who watched it know that, “I empathize. I want you to succeed.” Hence, the requisite happy ending, and how formulaic it’s put together.
The screenplay by Helen Childress was inspired by her own experiences with her friends during the recession of the early ’90s. The truth is, however, that pretty much any generation after the Boomers, including Millenials and Gen Z, will find honesty in “Reality Bites,” because a challenging post-school world has been at the heart of every right of passage our generations have had. Multiple recessions have occurred- including in 2008 and the COVID pandemic-charged one- and each one has been more debilitating than the last. Some of the things that makes “Bites” uniquely a Gen X story are the lack of the internet, lack of cell phones, and the spectre of a pre-cocktail-controlled AIDS. Even as I was in high school when this film came out, AIDS was something that loomed large in our minds, and how it’s handled here is with subtlety, but also honesty. And it’s hard to imagine this film working in a time without a communal phone everyone had to pay for, and the intervention necessary when someone racked up too many charges on it.
“Reality Bites” is the story of four friends- the aforementioned Lelaina (Winona Ryder), Troy (Ethan Hawke), Vickie (Janeane Garofalo) and Sammy (Steve Zahn)- and their lives after graduating college. Lelaina gets an apartment, and the rest just start moving in. Lelaina wants to be in entertainment, and is an assistant on a local morning show (hosted by a blowhard host played by John Mahoney); Vickie gets a job at The Gap; Troy is a guitarist who cannot hold onto a job; and Sammy is a hanger on with a secret. One day, Lelaina and Vickie get into an accident with Michael Grates (Stiller’s character), who starts spending time with Lelania and, when she shows him her footage, wants it for his channel.
As much as I think Stiller wants to poke fun at corporate America’s marketing of Gen X as a brand, he’s more interested in digging into these characters. He does so without judgement, even when they treat each other like crap. A year later, Hawke would create a young adult romance for the ages with Julie Delpy and Richard Linklater with the beginning of the “Before” films, but Troy and Lelaina is an interesting contrast to them. These characters have interest in one another, to be sure, but connect more as friends; it’s not until Michael enters the picture when standards- and interest- is raised. Ultimately, this is Ryder’s film and she is still a bit raw in the spotlight, but Lelaina is definitely a character I could find myself being interested in, even at her self-destructive moments. Troy is the sullen, romantic artist, someone who’s only at home expressing himself, and doesn’t really fit into society’s box. That’s definitely who I felt I was through a lot of my teens and early 20s, and then- unexpectedly- I became a lot like Vickie’s character, starting a job for the sake of having one before transitioning into a career almost by accident. The main five in the cast- Ryder, Hawke, Stiller, Garofalo and Zahn- are all terrific at bringing authenticity to these characters, and how some of them may have more in common than anticipated.
One final thing that brings “Reality Bites” home is its soundtrack. In a year of all-timer soundtracks at every turn, this is a fantastic addition to that run. The most notable song is Lisa Loab’s “Stay,” but one of the things that I love about Gen X musical taste isn’t just our propensity towards grunge and alternative music, but how we resonated with earlier music as well. This one includes not just Lenny Kravitz, Dinosaur Jr. and Crowded House, but covers sung by Ethan Hawke, U2’s “All I Want Is You,” “My Sharona” and more. And it all fits the film. It captures the emotions of a generation in flux, trying to conform to a life their parents had, but ultimately having to do their own thing in life. Stiller, Childress and the cast get it, even if the older generations didn’t.
