When Harry Met Sally…
I was originally going to go with something more in keeping with my wife and mine’s recent anniversary trip to Roswell, New Mexico for my first December ’25 “Repertory Revue,” but after the tragic murder of Rob Reiner and his wife, Michele Singer Reiner, it had to be his iconic, beloved romantic comedy where he met Michele at. The truth is, this one is overdue for review. It was in the middle of his amazing run from “This is Spinal Tap” to “A Few Good Men,” and the fact that a case can be made for pretty much any of those films being his best is a testament to how inspired he was with great material. And in the screenplay by Nora Ephron, he had remarkable material.
We begin with an elderly couple talking about the first time they met. We then see Harry (Billy Crystal) making out with his girlfriend, Amanda (Michelle Nicastro), when her friend, Sally (Meg Ryan), pulls up. Her and Harry are both going back to New York after school, and the 18-hour drive is…insufferable. They don’t see each other again for five years, when they’re on the same flight together. Then another five years passes, and they actually become friends. But can men and women be friends without sex getting in the way? Harry at 21 thought no. What about when the opportunity for real friendship arises?
This is just an effortless film. It moves through Harry and Sally’s relationship as if ten years have not passed from their first meeting to when they kiss on New Year’s Eve after a night of sex gets in the way. Reiner understands the strengths in Ephron’s script, and just lets them shine in the hands of his actors. Ephron’s script is simply a deconstruction of whether there’s truth to what Harry said to Sally that night. As a 48-year-old man, I think there can be truth to it at the start, but gradually, it recedes into the background when the friendship really takes hold. In moments, it could pop up, but ultimately, whatever matters most to the guy comes out, and that is the truth Ephron gets to beautifully. When they sleep together, it’s out of a need in the moment, and it gets tense because Harry does what he always does, but there’s a problem- he can’t talk to Sally about the encounter the way he normally would. And for Sally, that’s a breaking point. Them getting together at the end at New Year’s Eve is about Harry finally realizing that Sally is more than just a friend- she’s a soulmate. True love, to quote Reiner’s previous film in this run he started his career with.
Meg Ryan was always given her best moments when Ephron was there to write them. Yes, “Sleepless in Seattle” is kind of creepy, but the yearning in her character as she realizes the man she thought she loved is not the one she truly wants more than makes up for it. And I’m always deeply moved by her in “You’ve Got Mail,” as a woman trying to hold on to the memory of her mother, and not realizing the man she loves is in the man she loathes for trying to take that memory away from her. The trajectory of hers and Crystal’s relationship in this film is just magic, in a way that is both wonderfully funny and profoundly emotional. I got teary eyed when they kiss.
There’s so much to love about this film. Barry Sonnenfeld’s amazing cinematography (has New York in Fall ever looked this good?). The song arrangements that pepper the score by Harry Connick Jr. The supporting work by Carrie Fisher and Bruno Kirby- two more great talents who left us too soon (along with Ephron and now Reiner). In the end, it comes down to Crystal and Ryan, and Ephron and Reiner. Whatever alchemy they had to make hit every right note in this film, I’ll have what they had.
